Sunday, January 19, 2014

2.6 Miles of Wisdom

Friends, as I was walking the 2.6 miles home from the Firestone shop the other day (this was before they left a hammer in my wheel well), I thought of some of the wisdom I've gleaned during my existence on this earth. For each .1 mile, I thought of 1 little nugget of knowledge. Some of these are a result of mistakes, some have been learned the hard way, and others through repeated observation. I hope this can help anyone in any small way. Which is why I choose to share it with you today (instead of doing the homework I've put off for 4 days).

1. Floss regularly.

2. Yes, you will regret staying up until 3 am.

3. If you think you should shower, you need to shower.

4. There is literally always something more entertaining to do instead of homework; filing taxes, watching paint dry, passing a kidney stone.

5. Don't ever say "this is the worst it could get!". It will get worse.

6. Salt makes you puffy.

7. It is extremely hazardous to try to go to the bathroom on the side of the road when there are high winds.

8. Costa Rican hot springs are riddled with parasites. Don't drink the water.

9. Otters are literally the most adorable creatures on the planet. Sorry babies, puppies, and kittens.

10. If someone says their dreams are more important than you, that's a red flag.

11. Don't ignore red flags.

12. Heavy painkillers, while occasionally necessary, can make you a crazy-person. Don't do drugs.

13. Let people merge if you're driving on the 15.

14. Always have some hand hotties within reach. You never know when temperatures will become unexpectedly freezing. Having regular hotties within reach isn't a bad thing either.

15. The worse something tastes, the better it is for you.

16. Forgiveness is more for your own sake than the other person's.

17. While occasionally irresponsible, well spaced fun trips are necessary for your mental sanity.

18. The sun is the most glorious thing. While snow and clouds are the most vile.

19. 95% of the time, school assignments will seem worthless. It's for the incredibly valuable 5% that you keep trying.

20. Ignoring a person is the cruelest thing to do.

21. Always be flexible, your life can change drastically in a few seconds.

22. Some iPhone updates will actually make your life harder.

23. Don't base your happiness on another person's choices. Especially if that person is a sports team.

24. You will never regret being kind.

25. You will always regret eating food too spicy for you to handle in order to make a point.

26. There are always people who are having a worse day than you.