Sunday, February 23, 2014

Ninth Reason the World is Ending- The Invent of the Prius

I am definitely not writing this because I ran out of things to do in order to put off studying for neuoanatomy. I would never do that. I would never lie about not doing that. I would also never lie about lying. Friends, random Kazakhstani's, it is about time I tell you of something I have loathed for years. The Prius.

Now, let me preface this. I love the environment. I recycle. I used to take big bags of used plastic bottles home on school breaks in order to recycle. I think we should all be responsible about our use and exhaustion of natural resources. I even really like Al Gore.

But, Priuses are the absolute, undeniable worst! Now, I'm not talking about the first generation Priui. Those are just fine. It's the pretentious hatchbacks that just make my blood boil. I have disliked them on the road for years, and 3 times out of 4, it is a Prius cutting me off on the highway. (The other 1 time is usually a completely unnecessarily over-sized truck.) You see them tootling along the road, never quite at the speed limit and fueled by pure evil, with self-righteous, mocking undertones.

Those judgy headlights, those patronizing bumpers, and the ostentatious little antenna. Every single little detail of those cars fills me with fury.

I'm not even referring to your typical hybrid or even electric car. The leaf is quaint. The SmartCar is just a little hilarious joke of a car. If I could ever afford to, I'd buy myself a little hybrid Escape. It is the Prius, and the Prius alone that inspires so much passionate, vitriolic hatred inside of me. If you don't believe me about how horrible those little monsters are, pay attention the next time you're on the freeway. You'll know what I mean.

Now that I've churned up all of your internal outrage, let's take things down with an adorable picture of a baby otter: