Thursday, May 23, 2013

Les Miserables and Other Ridiculous Things

Now, I like much of the world did enjoy Les Mis. I saw the musical in London in fact, and liked it. I typically dislike musicals with a fiery passion. (Except for the glorious masterpiece Evita of course). However, there were some things I have to point out as being beyond ridiculous.

Absurd Thing #1

Really, Anne Hathaway. Turning to selling your hair, pulling your teeth, and prostitution was your only option?! Paris is a huge city. There isn't a single other factory to work in? There was no where else you could possibly work?? You lost your hair and were really sad and pathetic, and I feel for you, but you really should learn to take losing your job in stride. 

Absurd Thing #2

I'm sorry Victor Hugo, Javier is just too wacky for me to believe. I understand his portrayal is somewhat hyperbolic and metaphoric, but please. You really expect me to go with the idea that this guy will spend so many resources over decades to track down some dude who stole a loaf of bread, served his time, was legally released and then didn't quite follow parole correctly. Javier, you need to reevaluate some things buddy. And you need to try some escitalopram. There's no need for you to act like such a maniac. 

Absurd Thing #3

Cosette. (Amanda Seyfried). I still can't take her seriously. 

Absurd Thing #4 

Cosette and cutie pie's romance. 

I'm sorry, but if I fell so madly in love with some random dude I only interacted with for 5 minutes through a fence, I don't think my friends and family would be quite so supportive. You two are ridiculous. Straight up. 

Absurd Thing #5 

Pathetic Fantine. C'mon girl, have some self respect. We've all been through unrequited love. It sucks, but life goes on. Really. I know cutie pie is great, but there are other guys in that giant city. Just stay away from wackos like Javier. 

All things considered. The music is still so dang catchy. And the young actors are so pretty. And so is CGI 19th century Paris. I'd still watch it again.